8 Tips on How To Handle a Misbehaving Child

As a parent, you love your child more than anything else in the world, but even the most well-behaved children have their moments. They will turn your house upside down. They will be misbehaving. Your kids will have temper tantrums. But they will also have moments when you forget about all that and just live in the moment of happiness only they can create.

Parenting is a 24/7 job. We all know this. If this is news to you or you have just gotten your bundle of joy, wake up. Kids are not something you can hand over to someone else if you tire of them. It is not always going to be fluffy bunnies and rose-colored clouds. They will challenge you on a daily basis. But that is life with a toddler. But does your toddler constantly make you pull out your hair? Then you might want to read on to get some tips to make it better.

Try these tips for dealing with a misbehaving child:

1. Understand why children misbehave. Kids usually misbehave when they are hungry or tired. This is true for mine in part. So if you ensure your toddler has enough to eat and takes naps regularly, you’ll have fewer tantrums to contend with. But then again there might be other things going on as well.
   • Children also misbehave when they’re feeling angry or frustrated, especially if they’re told no. Avoid giving them everything they want, whenever they want it. But don’t hinder them in everything either. If it is safe and appropriate, go with it. Within reason of course.
   • Just keep in mind that some children throw tantrums when they aren’t given their way. And those are the times you have to be strong and not give in every time. I have had my oldest scream his way through an entire mall just because I wouldn’t give him the balloon he wanted. He tried the whole ‘I want, I want, I want’ and I told him the first time he asked for it that if he behaved he would get one. But he kept going on about it so I told him that his nagging had lost him the balloon. He started screaming and we left the mall.
     
2. Give your children the attention they deserve. Oftentimes, kids misbehave because they are seeking attention. Since they don’t know the difference between positive and negative attention, they’ll act out when they want you to notice them. So it is on you as a parent to give them attention, even if it is just with a ‘please wait your turn, mom (or dad) is just going to finish this.’
   • By giving children positive attention, you’ll reduce the tendency for them to act out. Spend as much time as possible with your children to provide plenty of positive attention. Maybe even teach them a non-verbal signal to let you know that they want attention. It can be that they grab your forearm and stand close to you when you talk to others, or hold on to your pant leg. Just be sure to give your kid a sign in return, that you have seen them. Because it is something that lets you know they want attention and lets them know you have noticed them.
     
3. Stick to a daily routine. When circumstances are out of the ordinary, children will sometimes act differently. By sticking to a consistent daily routine, you’ll reduce the chances of that happening. It can be hard if you as an adult don’t have a set routine. So maybe set your routines (but be flexible) and then work their routines into it. Google Calendar is an awesome tool to block out both your and your family’s schedules and routines.
   
4. Set clear boundaries and ensure your child understands the rules. Set rules and ensure your child follows them at home. It’s easier to discipline a child at home when you can take your time and be patient. Also always touch base with the other parent on what the boundaries are. Because unwittingly undermining or being undermined by the other parent will be exploited by your kid. They might be young but they aren’t stupid.
   • If you can get your child to be well-behaved at home, you’ll have an easier time getting them to do the same in outside situations.
     
5. Change a child’s behavior by suggesting an alternate activity. If your child is doing something you don’t want them to do, suggest an activity that’s more acceptable. If the child complies with your suggestion, you’ll have corrected the behavior without anyone getting upset.
   
6. Give your child choices. If you let your children choose between two or three different activities, they’re likely to be more cooperative. Providing several choices increases the chances of you suggesting something that they would want to do. But take care not to overwhelm your child with choices. One or two is enough for younger kids.
   • Give your kids power over some decisions, rather than just tell them what to do, because it gives them a sense of power.
     
7. Avoid making empty threats. If you say you are going to do this or do that as punishment, you need to be prepared to follow through with it. If you fail to follow through with a threat, your child will learn how to take control of the situation. They’ll learn to patiently wait for you to cave in, so they can get what they want.
   
   • When you follow through with your punishments, your child will learn that there are consequences for not following the rules.
     
   • Whenever possible, be sure the consequences happen immediately. Avoid waiting until you get home, two hours later, to give a toddler a timeout. If you don’t, your kid will think they got away with the bad behavior, and be confused about why they’re being punished for it. Cause and effect are never too early to teach. And being clear on the correlation between the two is vital.
     
   • Ensure that your consequences are age appropriate. A general rule of thumb is to give a toddler a timeout that lasts for 1 minute for each year of their age. For example, a three-year-old can handle a 3-minute timeout and a five-year-old can handle one that lasts 5 minutes.
     
8. Praise positive behavior. When parents have unruly children they often focus on punishments and consequences. By praising or rewarding good behavior, you’ll be giving your child the attention they desire while also reinforcing good behavior.

If your child is starting to get out of control, stay calm and remember these tips. Getting frustrated or angry will only make things worse for both you and your child. Kids pick up on emotions in a heartbeat.

On the other hand, staying calm and using these strategies will most likely result in your child learning to behave and cooperate with you. In the end, everyone will be happier.