Motherhood is a beautiful, exhausting, and all-consuming journey. Between diaper changes, school drop-offs, meal preps, tantrums (oh, the never-ending tantrums), and an ever-growing to-do list, the idea of “me time” can feel like a distant dream. But here’s the truth: Taking me-time as a mom isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity. You can’t pour out of an empty cup; you must recharge.
For a long time, I thought self-care meant lavish spa days, weekend getaways, or hours of uninterrupted relaxation (expensive!)—because that’s what everyone said was the “right” way to recharge. But most moms ain’t got time for that. Some of us are happy to have the time to drink our hot beverage of choice (tea for me) hot.
Running on empty doesn’t serve you or your family. You deserve moments of peace, even in the chaos of motherhood. And no, you don’t have to wait until the kids leave for college to claim those moments.
Waiting for the “perfect” time to practice self-care makes it more challenging. If you’ve been struggling to carve out time for yourself, this could be why.
Let’s break down the biggest myths about Me-time—and what actually works instead.
Table of Contents
❌ Myth #1: You Need a Whole Day Off to Recharge
Many people believe that authentic self-care requires taking a full day (or more) off from responsibilities, but this expectation often leads to disappointment and frustration.
What mom, without a team of nannies or babysitters, has the opportunity to take a whole day off? Something always seems to happen to derail my attempts: the kids get sick, or my husband has a last-minute work thing, or, heaven forbid, I get sick.
Example: “I used to think I needed an entire afternoon to relax, but finding the time felt impossible, so I just kept putting it off.”
🚀 The Truth: Instead of waiting for a full day of Me-time, the real solution is embracing small, intentional pockets of self-care. These short moments add up and make a significant impact on your well-being.
✔️ Try this instead:
- Enjoy a quiet, warm cup of coffee before the kids wake up.
- Take a 10-minute walk while listening to your favorite podcast.
- Read for a few minutes before bed. (My favorite!)
- Spend five minutes stretching or meditating.
- Listen to music that soothes you while driving or doing chores.
When you shift your mindset from needing hours of self-care to embracing smaller moments, you’ll find that self-care is always within reach.
❌ Myth #2: You Have to Do Everything Yourself
Another common belief is that being a good mom means handling everything alone, but this only makes motherhood way harder than it needs to be. It takes a village, so why not use that?
Example: “I thought asking for help meant I wasn’t doing enough, so I took on everything myself and ended up completely overwhelmed.”
🚀 The Truth: You don’t have to do everything on your own. Delegating and setting boundaries can free up time for yourself without sacrificing your family’s needs.
✔️ Try this instead:
- Share responsibilities with your partner.
- Assign age-appropriate chores to your kids.
- Set clear boundaries with family and friends about when you need alone time.
- Say no to unnecessary obligations that drain your energy.
- Rotate childcare with a friend so you each get some time off.
- If possible, hire occasional help, even if it’s just for an hour.
When you release the belief that you have to do it all, you create space to breathe and recharge; you get the me-time you as a mom need. You might also be surprised when your partner and/or kids step up and are willing to do more.
❌ Myth #3: Self-Care Means Spending Money
Perhaps the biggest myth of all is that self-care requires expensive treatments, retreats, or shopping sprees. This belief stops moms from prioritizing themselves because they think it’s not affordable. Personally, I have a hard time spending money on myself; I always end up buying stuff for the kids instead of myself.
Example: “I thought I needed a spa membership to practice self-care, but I couldn’t justify the cost, so I just skipped it altogether.”
🚀 The Truth: Everything changed once I stopped believing that self-care had to cost a lot of money and switched to simple, budget-friendly practices. Suddenly, I was able to prioritize myself without guilt or financial stress.
✔️ Try this instead:
- Take a relaxing bath at home with candles and soft music.
- Journal for a few minutes each day to clear your mind.
- Practice deep breathing or meditation.
- Enjoy a DIY skincare routine with products you already have.
- Find free online workouts or yoga videos and exercise at home.
- Swap childcare with a friend and take a quiet walk.
Self-care isn’t about spending money; it’s about prioritizing yourself in a way that fits your life.
❌ Myth #4: Waking Up Early is the Only Way to Get Me-Time
Many productivity gurus preach the power of waking up at 5 AM for self-care, but this advice can feel impossible if you’re already exhausted. I don’t know about you, but I need my sleep when I can get it.
Example: “I tried waking up early to get alone time, but my baby kept me up all night, and I was even more drained.”
🚀 The Truth: Self-care should work with your schedule, not against it. While early mornings can be great for some, they aren’t the only way to find me-time.
✔️ Try this instead:
- If mornings are too hectic, take 30 minutes at night to unwind.
- Use nap time or quiet time to rest instead of cleaning.
- If your kids are in school, schedule a short break for yourself during the day.
- If mornings work for you, great! But don’t force it if it makes you more tired.
There’s no “right” way to do self-care. The best time is the time that works for you.
❌ Myth #5: Me-time as a mom is Selfish
Many moms feel guilty taking time for themselves, thinking they should always be available for their kids. But this belief leads to burnout and resentment.
Example: “I felt bad taking a break because I thought it meant I wasn’t a good mom, but I realized I was more patient and present when I made time for myself.”
🚀 The Truth: Self-care isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. When you care for yourself, you show up as a better, more engaged parent.
✔️ Try this instead:
- Remind yourself that taking care of YOU is taking care of your family.
- Model self-care so your kids learn that balance is healthy.
- Create family self-care traditions, like quiet time or outdoor activities.
- Embrace the fact that your well-being matters just as much as your children’s.
The Bottom Line: What Actually Works
If you’ve been following the traditional self-care advice and not seeing results, it’s not your fault. The truth is, me-time as a mom is often misunderstood—but once you know what works, you can start making progress right away.
You don’t need a full day off, you don’t have to do everything alone, and self-care doesn’t have to be expensive. Prioritizing yourself is about making small, intentional choices that add up to a happier, healthier you.
Start today. Take five minutes for yourself. Breathe, reset, and remember—you deserve it.