If you are pregnant, Congratulations! It is the beginning of an awesome and sometimes scary journey. But in the end, it is worth it.
If you are not but trying to get there, Keep up the excellent work!
And if you are here just to help someone else, Welcome.
9 months seem such a long time! (but it really isn’t) so you think everything related to the baby, can be pushed ahead. Just a little bit. I did it myself with both of mine. It ended with me taking it one day at a time. Tracking milestones and appointments helped with keeping up with the planner. Keeping your sanity at the same time as your body is going through all of these changes, is tough. You have morning sickness. Maybe it is your 2nd+ kid so you have a child that stick to you like velcro, while you just want to sleep. Your legs swell with water retention. Or you have cravings, weird or otherwise. Been there done that! It sucked, but it made me realise ways to keep my sanity and take care of my pregnancy.
So having a plan is a good thing as life can come in between and then boom it is time for the delivery.
How to keep your mental sanity while pregnant
- Brainstorm names for the baby.
This is one of the things that really grounded me in the fact that we were having a baby. My husband and I bickered for months about what the baby was going to be named. We did this for both pregnancies that went beyond 20 weeks. The first one he “won” and the second we came to a consensus. I cross my fingers that if we have another my suggestion “wins”.
- Keep up with your normal routine and life as possible, baring if your doctor advises against it on medical grounds.
That means keeping your fitness routine going, keep working as long as you are able, it is all down to the individual. In my last pregnancy, I was on sick leave for a total of 2 months and I work in an office, so no heavy lifting or any such things but I have a precondition that makes it harder on my body so my doctor advised that I should take it easy at the beginning and the end of the pregnancy.
- If there is such a service in your area, sign up for free baby boxes.
They usually have samples of different baby products and diapers. Here in Sweden, I think there are at least 3 of them you can order and pick up just before delivery or right after.
- If you get a nesting urge, start planning your nursery or the baby’s space in your bedroom.
I do advise against assembling all the furniture until you are in the last stretch of the pregnancy. Not to put a somber tone on such a happy occasion but some things can go wrong in pregnancy even at a later date and the disassembling of such happy related furniture won’t help anyone, but that is only my two cents. In my case with our 2nd, my husband assembled the crib and the changing table as I was recuperating in the hospital after the delivery.
Medicinal help
- Make and keep up with your prenatal appointments.
Usually, it is one at 6-8 weeks then every two months until you get to the third trimester when they get closer together. Tip: keep a sheet or page in your calendar or planner to write down questions and/or thoughts between visits. It is important to keep up with the appointments because you are screened for any problems or issues that can arise.
- Remember to take your prenatal vitamins.
Especially folic acid to help prevent the baby from developing spinal issues. Start as soon as you know you are or when you start planning to get pregnant.
Technical help
- Use an app.
I am very attached to my phone. I have it with me almost always. So for me, it was given that I should try an app to help me keep track of the pregnancy. There is a ton of these out there but I used the app Preggers when pregnant and found it fun and quirky. It shows how big the baby is by comparing it to fruit. It also gives you facts about what you as a mom might experience during the pregnancy and counts down to the due date.
- Sign up for a baby registry.
I have never used this kind of service, mostly because there are no such things in my area but it seems like a fun thing to do. For me, it seems like window shopping online and you can send the list to family and friends. But a word of caution: don’t go overboard. There will be time after the delivery to buy clothes and shoes because then you know what sizes to get. Both of my boys used size 50 (newborn in the US) for about a week before I had to go up a size. So in hindsight, I wish I hadn’t gotten so many onesies and pants in that size.
Support
- If you have a child or even children.
Spend time with them and do things, just you and them, so they don’t feel neglected. But, depending on the maturity of the kid, explain when you get tired or just want to sit down and take it easy. If you want to, explain that there is a baby growing inside mom so that they are more careful when hugging. (I have a 5-year-old that is an expert on the head-first-running-hug, and it hurts to get headbutted basically in the stomach.)
- Do not isolate yourself.
Do not forget that if you have a SO, spend quality time with them as well. Go on dates, cook fancy dinners together (within dietary restrictions ofc.) Here you can find some ideas on how to date your SO if you have kids already.
If you don’t, spend time with your friends and family. Do lunch with your girlfriends or go to that mama-yoga class that seemed like fun and find a tribe there.
Either way, don’t isolate yourself in your pregnancy bubble as it is so easy to do. And don’t be afraid to ask for help and support from your midwife or GP as well as your close ones.
- Find out where your cravings lead you
Write down your cravings. Both you and the person that is shopping for you will thank you. You, because you will have a list to look back on and laugh about after the baby is born. The person doing your in-the-middle-off-the-night shopping will thank you because then they know if the cravings change. I think my husband was very glad we do not have any 24/7 stores close by whenever I have been pregnant. Because I am sure I would have made him go get me ice cream or pickles when that particular craving hit.
In the end,
Being pregnant is a beautiful thing. I’d go back and go through that again. But that is me. Being pregnant isn’t for everyone. And that is ok. Having kids isn’t for everyone. I even know a few people that shouldn’t have gotten kids but did anyway and that is ok too.
What I want to say is, take it for what it is. You are growing an effin human inside of you. You are (within reason) allowed your quirks and kinks. It will not be a dance on roses (it sounds painful for such a positive saying) all the time. There are ups and downs with everything, all we can hope for is that the ups outweigh the downs.