Parenting Advice for Disciplining Children with ADHD

Positive parenting when disciplining has helped many families to achieve greater harmony, and this approach may be especially important for parents raising children with ADHD. Because a child with ADHD can have a tougher time regulating and controlling their emotions. My oldest hugs me with the same amount of emotion as he uses when he is acting out aggressively. Which is a lot. He doesn’t really see the difference or what is wrong with one but good with the other.

A recent study confirms that cutting back on yelling and spanking can lead to biological changes that make it easier for a child to regulate their emotions and behavior.

Researchers at Ohio State University studied family relations among preschool children with ADHD and their parents. They found that parents who received as little as 10 to 20 weeks of coaching showed significant improvement in positive parenting skills. Because as parents we also need to relearn when faced with a child whose brain is wired differently.

As harsh interactions decreased, their children demonstrated less abnormal heart activity and greater impulse control. Which is a big part of ADHD. Impulse control that is.

ADHD is challenging for everyone, but you can learn to discipline your child more effectively. Consider these ideas that will help you to create a calmer and happier home life for you and your child. And if they don’t work right away, which they probably won’t, keep trying. One day you will get through to your child. You just need to do a lot of trial and error to learn what works for your kid. What makes your kid behave in a socially appropriate manner. Because let’s face it, a kid with ADHD or ADD or any combination thereof will never be as ’normal’ as a kid without them.

Encouraging Positive Behavior:

Prevention is more effective than discipline. Create conditions that make it easier for your child to use their strengths and follow house rules. Ergo, learn what makes your kid tick, and learn the signs so you can prevent any acting out.

1. Understand ADHD. Your child may be highly creative and energetic. On the other hand, they probably struggle with some things like listening attentively and planning ahead. So help them with this. Break tasks down into smaller chunks. Have them wear headphones if they get easily distracted by noise and so on.
2. Enjoy one-on-one time. Your child is less likely to act out if they feel secure and loved. Try to arrange at least one-half hour a day when you do something pleasant together. It could be your bedtime rituals or chatting and playing ball after school.
3. Offer rewards. Give your child an extra incentive to comply with your expectations. Offer praise or small gifts when they complete their homework and cooperate with their siblings. If they have trouble waiting a week or more to get their prize, let them earn points throughout the day. But make sure, if there is siblings, that jealousy doesnt come to play. Do not compare children. It will only build resentment.
4. Be specific. Make it easier for your child to do what you want by spelling out each step involved. Instead of asking them to clean their room, ask them to pick their toys up off the floor and put their clothes in a laundry hamper. This works for kids without ADHD as well.
5. Use visuals and sounds. Many children with ADHD understand images and sounds better than words. Clarify your instructions with other cues. Set a timer that will buzz when homework time is up. Hang a poster in the bathroom with pictures of a child brushing their teeth and putting on pajamas. Have a visual schedule with all steps in pictures and text. This can help your child even earlier if they cant read yet.

Maintaining Effective Discipline:

Of course, there will sometimes be lapses. Be prepared to discipline in a way that works better than nagging or criticizing. They will stop listening to your nagging. And criticizing damages their self-esteem in a way that will hurt them in the long run.

1. Focus on learning. Discipline means training rather than punishment. When your child slips up, show them what they need to do to succeed the next time. Dont scold, ask questions as ’why?’ and really listen to their answer. And if you get ’I dont know’ gently keep pushing.
2. Limit time outs. Sitting completely still may be overwhelming for some children with ADHD. If you use time outs, keep them brief, and consider giving them credit if they manage to keep their mouths shut. In this time of screen time, time out can also be on their screen time.
3. Establish priorities. Trying to resolve too many issues at once can backfire. Deal with one subject at a time. Give your child a chance to fix one situation before you tackle the next.
4. Stay calm. Children with ADHD may be even more sensitive than the average child when it comes to being influenced by a parent’s mood. If you can remain composed even when your child hits a classmate or keeps losing their glasses, you’ll be in a better position to work together towards lasting solutions.

Parenting a child with ADHD is similar to parenting any child, but it usually requires more effort and patience. You and your child can have a loving relationship if you believe in their abilities and understand their needs. A child with ADHD has a different perspective on a lot of things. So if you can just learn, together with your child, to navigate the pathways that they will walk on, everything will work out. Stay positive and reach out for the support you need.

If you want to read more please go here.